Monday Night Bites: Point Break and Patrick Mahomes

 Entertainment: Point Break


When aliens come to Earth, and ask for a film to represent the human race, I would step away from Tom Brady’s 1,000th season to dial up Point Break on my virtual reality goggles. 


The action film starring Keanu Reeves and Patrick Swayze does a great job in many ways of showing how humans think and exist. Here are a few ways in which in which this is true:


Fun is Awesome


This movie is the Las Vegas (still weird to type) Raiders. If you look at it from a critical lens, nothing holds up. However, if you just sit back and press play, it will impress. This is part of human nature: I can’t explain why a game of Monopoly Deal or turning on some MACtion is such a blast, but it just is.


The best example of this is bank robberies. I don’t want to be part of a bank holdup, or robbing one, but bank robberies are some of the most pleasing scenes to view. There’s something about the thrill of the action that is so exciting and fun. 


The surfing scenes exemplify this concept too. I have about as much experience with surfing as Ben Simmons does with three pointers, yet I still love the scenes. Watching Bodhi navigate the waves is incredible. It’s inexplicable, yet mesmerizing. Certain activities are just fascinating to the human mind


How Stuff Works


Subtly, Point Break does a great job covering Human Society For Dummies. 


It covers the concepts of jobs, demonstrating how everyone serves a job in the day, for money. These green wads of paper are the most valuable things in our world, and many will work, or steal to get more of it. 


Crime is also covered well. You can do bad things to get ahead in life. Many times, you will get away with it. However, if you’re caught, you are punished for your misdeeds. 


Finally, leisure is represented, with surfing being the main example. People aren’t always grinding for more money. They have hobbies that they’re enthusiastic about to keep them happy. 


How Dumb We Are


The writers in Point Break do a great job demonstrating how they, along with countless people, don’t know how stuff works. They give Johnny a backstory of being from Ohio, yet he also possesses the biggest surfer dude accent. On the other hand, Bodhi, the other star, is a lifelong surfer, who has no hint of an accent.


They apparently also have no clue how both football scholarships and law school work, saying Johnny got a football scholarship to go to law school. C’mon people. I’m 14 and know that’s not how stuff works.


These are 2 of countless examples summarizing how hopeless our species is in the intelligence department.


NOTE TO FUTURE SECRETARY OF PROTECTION AGAINST ALIEN INVASIONS: Be careful what you show them. With a lot of knowledge of our society, we could be the Josh Norman to their Derrick Henry stiff arm. Don’t give them too much information. If all else fails, just play E. T. on repeat. 


Sports: Patrick Mahomes


I’m not sure if you’ve heard, but Patrick Mahomes is good at football. Sunday night’s game in Oakland Vegas was another vintage performance (read: every game) from the reigning Super Bowl MVP.


 In last year’s regular season, we were too focused on our shiny new toy, Lamar Jackson, to enjoy Mahomes’ dominance. I don’t just throw around the TFG word lightly, but I think we were taking him for granted. 


Fortunately, his 3 great playoff games reminded us that he was the best player in football. Now, he’s back to absolutely crushing defenses, and while everyone’s reminders of his dominance can be grating, they’re correct. Pat Mahomes is a cheat code.


The most striking thing about Mahomes’ game winning TD drive last night wasn’t the drive itself. That part was as predictable as Journey 2: The Mysterious Island (I felt like Tony Romo watching that movie, calling out every jump scare and plot twist).


The shocking aspect was the lack of shock. Jason Witten caught a TD with 103 seconds left on the clock, temporarily giving the Raiders the lead. Unfortunately, that’s 103 seconds too many to give The Musician/Fatrick/Mahomeboy (pick your favorite, those are from Football-Reference. I love Mahomeboy).


It just felt like the Chiefs scored. It was as unceremonious as can be, not because it wasn’t spectacular, but because we felt like we were watching a coronation instead of a 2 team game. I turned on the TV knowing that Mahomes would come through, and that’s exactly how it happened.


So, for those reasons, I’d argue that Patrick Mahomes is above average at football.


Rabbit Holes of the Week


People are so good at surfing. It’s insane: https://youtu.be/ar1TkD5Cz_o 


These are Mahomes’ college highlights: this guy was incredible: https://youtu.be/X8tf0eXBURo 

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